Sunday, September 29, 2013

the time we saw the lumineers for five minutes

Expectation of The Lumineers concert:
Intimate, inside setting where we are five feet from the stage and I can see Wesley and Neyla and Jeremiah's faces construed with passion from the lively, heart-felt music like so



The opening bands play 15 minutes each and then The Lumineers come on at 7:30 p.m.

Brett and I are seated in chairs surrounded by decent people wearing skinny jeans and oxford shoes and hip bowler hats with short, straight-across bangs. The Lumineers play long into the night and we sing with them and are filled up to the brim with their folk band goodness.

We leave saying "That was the best night of my life!" and "I love how Jeremiah stretched out his hand and touched us". We fall asleep that night with guitarists dancing in our heads.



Reality of The Lumineers concert:
Intimate and inside setting? Hehe. There was about 1,000 people there. And it was outside. Decent people? Some but there were also the crazy drunks and the pot smokers. Obviously I'm not an experienced concert-goer.

The opening band "Dr. Dog" and another band I can't remember were fine, but it took the crew 45 minutes to set up the stage in between. So we sat on the grass and took pictures like this

 Very awkward. I was born to be a model.






This is my personal favorite.

The crew took so long setting up and taking down sets, it was incredible. I'm almost sure premature babies would have done it faster. Actually, I'm sure.

The second opening band (whom I forgot the name) didn't start playing until 9:15 and played about 3 songs before the head crew guy said that it was too windy to proceed.

The second opening band that I can't remember. Aren't our seats good?

The crew then took down the set with their sloth-like arms and big beer bellies and decided that instead of using the stage for The Lumineers, they would use the balcony. By this time I'm like, whatever, I just want to see the darn Lumineers and get out of this place and go home because I have a sprained ankle and I'm cold and we live 1 hour and 45 minutes away and I have to work at 6:50 tomorrow.

Then the crew took another 40 minutes to set up the stage on the balcony. I mean, how hard is it to put a few mikes and a cello in place? For reals.

The Lumineers finally came up to the balcony at 9:50. By this time, we've been there for nearly 3 hours and Brett is being such a good sport and I think that possibly The Lumineers is just a fake band used by terrorists to coax innocent civilians into one place and kill them all with a big torpedo.

This is zoomed in.

The Lumineers played a few songs and we sang along. At the 5th song, a small gust of wind came and blew my bangs around (like above awkward picture). The Lumineers panicked and the main crew guy said, "Due to dangerous weather conditions, we must end the show early tonight."

SAY WHAAAAAAT? A little blow of wind now falls under the category of dangerous weather?

Let me tell you, this was not oh-my-gosh-a-tornado-is-coming-oh-i-am-getting-sucked-in-aww-what-is-that-white-light-oh-know-i-am-dead wind. This was a-little-tickle-on-my-face wind.

And with that they canceled the show.

We waited 3 hours for this crap.

I was furious. If the Great Saltair (the venue) was so concerned about the weather, they could have looked it up ahead and planned accordingly. Instead, they wanted to get more money and oversold their tickets and put it outside.

I got an email a bit ago from The Lumineers saying they would refund my tickets. Well, it's been a week since that email and I still have no money. So, I will not forgive them until their debt is payed in full.

I have become disillusioned from the concert experience.

I'll stick to musicals from now on thank you very much.





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